For some reason, Mr Johnson's election to the PTA board suffered when posters featuring this picture captioned "Herbert Johnson is always thinking about YOUR kids" were posted around town.
~~~~
What would be the best liquor to use with this mixer?
~~~~
When a brother and a sister and a brother love each other very much.....
"Let's attack people's political views and call it "Art" and chuckle smugly how anyone who doesn't share my opinions is dumb. That should get my GPA up for sure!"
In today's shocking news: Pretentious liberal college art students believe they are deeply profound, culturally superior and much smarter than everyone else. Like every generation before them, newly emboldened with daddy's car keys and a credit card loaded with student debt, a slew of bright eyed young dreamers venture forth to remake the world in their image. Unfortunately, not everyone has the benefit of their great wisdom and needs to be shocked into awareness with something so cleverly self-evident that even those ignorant slobs who work in factories, shipyards and mines can understand. In a nation where people demand the right to own the evil death machines they call "guns" homicide should be an easy sell. So purely in the interest of high art, a dream is born.
The cunning plot emerges.
So, now is where I introduce myself. I'm just some guy on the internet. While browsing one of the world's most popular websites, Reddit, I stumble across a photo of one flyers being distributed by the Project Free America "staff", and having seen television in last twenty years I am struck by just how pathetic and lame of a joke this is. Sensing a political agenda like a fart in an elevator, I quickly come across the blog screen-capped above. You see, the internet is a series of tubes and this magic gnome on my desk called Google (you might have heard of it) excels in scurrying through them to find things relevant to my search query. So, I mail the link to a couple friends and post to the PFA Facebook page a sarcastic comment. Soon I am engaged with one of her "Friends" she has enlisted. O.K., I'll bite. I enjoy lulz as much as the next guy and I hoped that one of her "Friends" might be more entertaining. Sadly, I was wrong. (I put the word "friends" in quotes because I am of the belief that anyone as profoundly unfunny as this mastermind is probably so smugly self-superior that even the neighborhood dog doesn't wish to be associated with her unless a pork chop is involved.)
In a move that will surprise nobody, America's favorite cult, PETA, wishes to spread their message of lunacy to Mars. Not to be outdone, The Church of Scientology will surely wish to send a goodwill ambassador to ensure that any traces of Xenu's intergalactic thetans are dealt with properly. Between the vegans insistence that no medical treatments be available that were derived from animal research and the Scientologists demands that all form of psychiatric care be banned, Earth's first colony on Mars will probably end up like Jonestown if indulged.
Why, me of course. I'm Doc Barleycorn. I'm just some guy.
I have a wide array of interests including telling tall tales, wasting time, playing with critters, tilting at windmills, nerd-type things, food, unusual humor, and various illegal/immoral activities.
What
Generally stuff that interests or entertains me. Things like pictures ranging from the cute to the disturbing, stories, videos, grammatical errors, links, opinions, jokes, news, and anything else I happen to feel like posting. Everything posted here is 100% untrue except for the things that aren't. Make up your own mind to which is which.
When
Either when it happened, when I posted it or when you read it. Duh. Do you think I'm some sort of time traveler or something? If I could do that I would go back in time and give Justin Bieber's dad a condom.
Where
I'm in the magical land of Ozarkia, which is a lot like Narnia or Equestria but you can always get a stiff drink, a juicy burger or a woman of disrepute.
Why
This is mainly a way for me to organize my thoughts, save some highlights of the untamed interwebs, indulge in a bit of catharsis and possibly entertain those who enjoy this sort of thing.
